Monday, April 9, 2007

SPRINKLE ME OR NOT?

I am a 30 year old woman who lives in the Maryland area. I have been in a committed relationship with a nice guy for almost a year now. Let me give you some much needed background –

We've dated for a sometime before we became intimate with one another. It just always seemed like he wanted to wait. Which in this day and age, was a good thing.

The first time was ok. I mean it wasn't the best I had...but I made the best of it. We both participated in oral sex BUT, he said that he didn’t really like to do it,…it just wasn’t his jump off.

(I know what you’re thinking: and NO, it wasn’t smelly lol – he just said oral didn’t get him off)

To be honest, he just didn't seem to be into sex that much you know?

We had stopped having sex for a while..I thought it was me at first…but he blamed his job, lack of time, etc.

But he insisted it wasn’t’ me…So since we hadn't been intimate in a while, he decided that we'd go out to dinner and get a nice hotel room (I guess to change the scenery and spice up the bedroom a lil' bit)

That night was really nice; we were all over each other. It was just the type of attention I needed from him. Remember, he didn’t seem to be that much into sex…so this type of action was new but welcomed…So were making love and its great and he says to me?

"I'm ready to bust baby" and I'm like “yes...come on daddy” and he pulls out, stands up over me and lets loose on my breast...

But what I thought to be "nut" landed on my breast...ended up feeling like an abundance of warm water with an awful but familiar odor...

When I came to my senses - I realized that it was Urine. Yes, my man pissed on me. Right on my face and breast...the entire bed was full of urine that had rolled off of my body...

Of course - I almost lost it. I thought I was going to have to be placed in a Sheppard Pratt facility after this one.

He immediately apologized and said that he didn't know he was about to urinate he thought he had to "nut" but urine came out accidentally.

HE begged me not to tell anybody and apologized repeatedly.

I forgave him, but part of me isn't buying this. I thought men knew the difference between "nutting" and "pissing" you know?

My best friend told me that she believes that he has a fetish for "Golden Showers" and just didn't know how to tell me. I think he wasn't sure if I'd be down with that type of fetish.

I think that this explains why he was never into "sex" that much...I'm fully convinced that he waited for the right opportunity to perform this horrible act to see if I'd be ok with it. And when he realized I wouldn't be, he flipped it and said it was an accident.

Is this a case of a man who just didn't know? Or was this a classic R. Kelly move?

Please help - I'm going crazy over here...

Sincerely,
Ms. Golden Showers? Or Climaxx gone wrong

17 comments:

Karen said...

I believe his nasty ass knew exactly what he was doing and I agree with your best friend. I strongly agree that guys know the difference between urine and sperm. If you were okay with it he probably would not have said anything. If he’s into that kind of thing he could have at least ran the scenario past you to see how you feel about it first before he decided to do something so gross without your permission. He straight disrespected you and personally it would take me awhile before I could forgive his ass. I’ve had plenty of guys express right in the middle of the act that they had to pull out because they needed to piss. So that’s bull shit about him not knowing. Kick his nasty ass to the curve.

Tonio said...

I don't see how he could have mistaken the two. I can't speak for any other man but for me urinating and busting a nut are two different feelings, they are not even in the same class. In fact I can't even bust a nut if I have to pee really bad, so the difference is clear. I think urinating on women is busting a nut to him and he lost his composure in the heat of passion, then tried to cover it up by saying he thought he nutted. If he really felt like he was nutting while pissing then he needs to seek medical attention because there is something wrong with the plumbing. However I agree with the best friend, I think he has a piss fetish and he is not being honest.

Sharon said...

That was an R. Kelly move. Don't get it twisted sista. He is a nasty bastard and has no regard for you or your sensitivity as a woman. Now I know, you have to know that a man CANNOT cum and piss at the same time because first of all a man's DICK can only do one of two things at a time, PISS OR CUM it's only one hole. He knew exactly what he was doing and thought perhaps you would enjoy him urinating on you as much as he did. I personally think that you need to cut this disgusting bastard off because he does not respect you.

Michyle said...

WOW..ok...dude set u up. THe whole suggestion of a romantic night out to dinner & hotel...was the ultimate setup. He knew he was going to make it rain when he made the suggestion. He probably suggested the hotel cause he didn't want to be responsible for messin gup your sheets & matress so...the hotel was the ultimate spot. I know that me being a female, if I need to use the bathroom before or while I'm having sex, I make sure I handle that so it won't interfere with the ultimate pleasure of intercourse...afull bladder & sex doesn't mix so...dude wanted to sprinkle you...it was a setup. With that said, has dude been released from the ICU because if it were me, it would've been some problems. On the real...talk to dude, let him know u didn't appreciate what he did and tell him to lose your number. THAT'S JUST NASTY!!!

Nellie said...

Well I have never had that happen and I have been with a few...just a few in all of my years. I did not think that one could confuse the two. Personally I don't think I could let that one past...ever ever. But if you think you can than you are one good person. Just be careful because you never know what other fetishes he may have.

CapCity said...

I'd love to hear a male perspective on this, but EWWWWWWW, YUCK! I would've HAD to get up, dress, walk out & let that one GO! I'm already suspect when a brother is so "cool" about sex anyway. sounds like he has other issues...best of luck to ya on that one!

Ronald said...

Maaaaaaaaan if he has any bit of sexual experience, unless he's 11 years old, he knows nut from pee. You got pissed on!!!!!! eeeeeewwww...

Honey-Libra said...

I agree with your best friend. He knew what his nasty tail was doing and tried to play it off...boo you know when you bout to pee..now pass gas is one thing but peeing ohhh heck no. I mean if you down you down, but he should have made sure before he peed on you..WOW that's just nasssstttiiii

Shai said...

I just read stories about how hotels are not clean and then to hear this. YUCK! Makes me not want to sleep in a hotel again.

Let this man go, I say to her. Disrespectful behavior like that means he gets an exit card.

Tańtruм said...

Yuck!!!

He knew, how can you know pee from sperm...

I can't speak for a man but I know as a woman there is big difference in the big "O" and peeing.

Sheesh!!!

A. B. said...

Apart from my disgust, shock, and disbelief it is Biologically impossible to urinate if fully aroused, dude knew what he was doing....

Maybe he was born a girl? Seen any baby pictures?

dc_speaks said...

ok...dude pissed on you. every and I do mean...every man knows the differenee in the feelings.

punch dude in the jaw for the attempt at degradation and kick him in thes for trying to pull a fast one.

feel better, then have a nice day!

i hope this helps.

Villager said...

I don't know if the brother knew or not ... I'm just trippin' how he begged you not to tell anyone and then you tell the world on your blog (smile).

Methinks that u need to let the brother go and move on...

peace, Villager

MysTery said...

WTH??? Oh no sister! He was very wrong for that one. And I would have told him that he needs to leave unless he wants me to go to jail. Many props to you for not ending up there yourself.

I couldn't even look at him again...sheesh.

Philly's Andrea said...

This is SFF!!! I'm sorry to laugh it's just that I have come a cross A LOT of men who really enjoy this...women to. I can't say that I'm one of them but I have close friends who have multiples by it. (cringe)

Motorcycle Fairings said...

yayks! it's so gross!

garden decorations said...

yakkk! that is ridiculous